Now, all of that is completely separate from my getting married in a little over two months, but the fact that I am also planning a wedding and having to deal with the personalities of 110+ people is not all that helpful in the anxiety department.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think all of us get at least somewhat offended when we wave at someone across the street and they don't wave back. Especially when we're young. That kind of thing haunts the shit out of us. Why doesn't that person like me? Did I do something wrong? Did I offend them? Well, with texting and the Internet and social media---that same concept has been amplified in today's society to an upmost extreme. And it sucks. And it isn't "okay".
If you text someone a "Hey, how are ya?" and they don't respond, that's one thing. If you ask them something that is pretty important, that's another. And if suddenly you find yourself texting/calling/messaging several people about several different things--all of which having a different level of "importance"--and none of those people respond to you, or worse---they are short and dismissive... You end up like me. Anxious. A little pissed off. And writing about it.
I get that we live in a world where we are both incredibly busy and glued to our phones at exactly the same time. Brushing our teeth and checking our Facebook accounts have become just as important as the other. Why then, I beg of you, is updating your Snapchat more important than responding to a friend or family member who has reached out to you? When did we start prioritizing what we ate for breakfast being on our Instagram Story before calling back a loved one who maybe just wants to say hello, or maybe has something important to talk about?
How the hell do you know? You didn't call back.
When someone reaches out to me, whether it be a matter big or small, I respond as quickly as I can. Because I was raised to believe that ignoring people completely is not all that polite. So when did ignoring people become the new norm in our world? What button got pushed in people's brains that now says, "I don't feel like responding to that person, so I'm just not going to..."?
Now, I'm sure there will be people reading this who say, "But I'm just bad at texting." Or, "I'm really busy all the time." Or, "Well, I respond in my head a lot and forget to actually text back." Or, "I meant to call that person back, but I forgot." I get those things. I do. They happen. But this goes a hell of a lot deeper than that.
What ever happened to connecting with each other?
Not to get too preachy or rant-y (which I probably already have), but I still believe in the value of connecting with the other human beings on this planet. Regardless of the situation, I value respecting other people and reaching back when they reach out. I could never even stomach not responding to someone in the way that so many I care about have begun on this path of not responding to me.
And it's not just me! I've heard this same complaint from very few others, so I know at least I am not alone in this sea of wasteful dismissiveness.
I'm going to try to not contradict myself by emphasizing the importance of putting our phones down from time to time to connect with the world around us... (Believe me, I'm guilty of being glued to my phone, too.) But there's a difference between mindlessly checking Twitter and actually connecting with the people who have reached out to you on your phone.
If you're reading this and thinking that I'm overreacting, you're part of the problem. You see, I don't overreact if this happens every once in a while. But when it's constant and in a row, it sparks a reaction that the writer inside of me cannot simply keep ignoring.
We are on one slippery slope if we genuinely think that out-right ignoring and/or blowing off our fellow man is an okay thing to do.
If someone waves at you, wave back.
If someone texts you, text them back.
If someone calls you, answer.
If someone is reaching out to you, reach back.
It's fine to be busy. It's great to put your phone down and enjoy the world around you, connecting with the people in front of you. But this habit of ignoring and dismissing each other completely has got to stop. It's hurtful, regardless of intention. And it's downright lazy.
Besides having ourselves and the Big Man upstairs...
connection, at the end of the day, is all we have.
And it's time we stop taking it for granted.
Whether it's hello or something far more important... it matters. It deserves your attention. It deserves your time. It deserves to be acknowledged. Because people matter. And what they say, matters.
So if someone waves at you, wave back.
Wave back.
